Look Back

Do you ever look back and think I could have done that better? Ugh! The what ifs and should haves can be the worst thing for our Christian minds. The answer is always going to be yes! As we grow as Christians we can see our mistakes and how we could have obviously done them better. This is being refined in the fire at its finest! Lately I have been thinking about how I feel like I could have been a better parent so, I guess this blog post could be for parents with young children. Any who, I hope it helps you feel like you are going to survive because I know there are times when you are in the trenches of parenting you feel like you are not going to make it to the other side!

Looking back there are things I wish I would have handled a little better, actually a lot better. At that time in my life I was straddling the fence with one foot in the world and the other in church. This is NOT the way to raise children; I know that now. You are called to be a witness and your children should be those you witness to. I say all the time the hardest people to witness to are your family because they see you in good, bad and ugly.

The next thing I wish I had done is simply taken the time to do. Take the time to snuggle in bed two extra minutes or stop and listen when they want to talk about nothing. You can’t get this back and I miss those times. The moments when we would try to interpret Adam’s lisp or Kathryn’s talk at 4 like she was a grown adult for hours on end. You know I have to share stories! Haha! I can embarrass my kids if I want to, I birthed them. One night Adam came and got in the bed with us, this was very rare he was always an independent sleeper. He climbed in the bed with us and said he was scared. After making sure he was ok, Adam let out this big sigh. When asking if he was ok he said “I need dubbers.” Tal and I were perplexed. We could not figure out for the life of us what he was talking about. So he repeated the same thing. Finally I think we asked him where would we get the dubbers to which he replied that Tal pulled them off. We both laughed and Tal gave Adam the COVERS he had obviously pulled over on himself. Tal & I will still call them dubbers on occasion. 😂😂

Lastly, I wish I had lived so that they could see that my imperfections could be made forgivable and right through Christ. I was listening to an audiobook this week and one of the statements shared in it was that when our children are born they are sinners and we have to teach them how not to sin. That statement struck me like a cast iron skillet to the noggin. If we as parents don’t teach our children the difference in walking with Christ and walking in the world, who will? The ways of the world will always win! I would let the act of parenting, work and everything else around me at the time take the spotlight off of Christ when I would feel overwhelmed. Back then I stressed over the small stuff! Don’t do it! Time is fleeting! Live in the moment and not in the what’s happening tomorrow.

My children are hard working, responsible, good adults but do I think I could have done things better by them? Yes, we can be our own best critics! I can tell you this though, there is redemption in Christ! He sees and knows our faults and still forgives us! As a Mama of grown children, their names flow off my lips more now that they ever have. I don’t have them to raise, but I do have them to pray over. When I think about how much I love them, Christ loves them even more!

Parents of adult children, forgive yourselves, I had to! God created them for such a time as this. They still need you even if they don’t recognize it yet, pray for them daily!

Thanks for reading my ramblings! May God bless you and your family! ~Melynda

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Life Lessons for my Younger Self

A friend of mine posted on Facebook two pictures of herself. Her wedding day and a more recent picture. She stated her thoughts on herself then and now her expectations and her life experiences. It made me stop and think of things in my life and how if I could have seen into the future when I was younger what I would have done differently. I know I can’t change my life but I thought maybe some of these young ladies that are just starting out may find it useful.

Be yourself! Don’t try to be someone you are not. You are created in God’s image and are perfectly and wonderfully made. Stop looking at worldly imperfections because when you get older and gravity takes hold you will think; Wow, I had a smoking hot body when I was younger! Now I just try to keep it all covered and tucked in! 😂😂

Don’t sweat the small stuff! I tried to keep everything in this perfect perception I had of how life is supposed to be. Don’t do it! Go snuggle with your husband or baby. There comes a time that you might not have them. They will remember when you took that time out of the business life throws at you to devote for them. I wish I had worried less and enjoyed more!

Slow down! You do not have to say Yes to everything! Things come along like a grave illness 😑 that will make you slow down. Don’t be like me! Slow your roll before it slows you!

Build each other up! I don’t know about you but it’s hard when someone is hateful. I want to lash out and be ugly back. A few kind words doesn’t cost a thing and if you can’t find anything nice to say just zip it! I struggle with the zipping part. 😣

Let it go! I would be willing to say that my mama has told me this a thousand times in my life. I have let folks steal my joy because I can’t let something go. Don’t let them. Chances are the don’t have joy in the first place and they are miserable. Pray for them. Most likely the thing they need is a true relationship with Jesus – the Real Joy Giver!

Make God a priority! Read your Bible everyday. There are plenty of apps and online Bible Studies you can’t do. Take 15-20 minutes out of your day for the one who made you. I promise it will give you a different perspective on life. My grandma used to say “Good stuff in good stuff out!” It is so true. The world bombards us with worldly things that when I was a child would never see the light of day! Protect your heart, protect your family and protect your future!

Thanks for reading! ~ Melynda

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Precious Memories

Tal and I have graciously been given the honor of owning his grandparents property and home. We have been married almost 32 years and it has been his dream. Our plan is to retire on it. For him it is home. For me it’s peace and comfort. There are so many great memories at this place. Memories of loved ones that are no longer with us; along with Christmas, Easter and New Year’s gatherings. Time stands still here to us. It floods me with memories of my own grandparents because it’s simple here. There is well water, a clothes line, fireplace for heat, box fans for air and one little bathroom with a door to beat on when someone is holding you up! I do a lot of beating on the door. 😂

His grandmother lived to be 94 and if you knew Ruby Walton her yards were meticulous and she had every flower you could imagine and then some. Time has not been on our friend since the yards haven’t been tended as they have needed. Tal tells our (adult) children that we need to have a family day at Big Mama’s. I’m sure you are thinking does it work? Do they come? Uuhhmm; that answer is no. 😂😂

Tal bless his heart tries to keep it cleaned up but it is overwhelming and it’s not like I am a great help. I never know when my body will be up to the task. We try but, it is nothing compared to Ruby! How in the world she kept all of this up is beyond us. When we find some new flower or even bricks randomly placed around something we have to call his mama to come down here and see what it is. There have been times of uncertainty so, we just act like something is there and keep checking to see what pops up. It’s like a treasure hunt with flowers! 😂

I’ve been off this week for doctors appointments and such but last night we decided (spur of the moment) to spend the night. I got to sleep in, make my coffee and walk around the yard. Tal suggested it. He told me I would be surprised at what’s blooming. I was certainly delighted by all of the beautiful blooms! There is so much that needs to be done to get the yard cleaned but the blossoming flowers caught my eyes over the pine straw, briars, weeds and sticks.

It reminds me of God’s goodness. If we choose to see the ugly in things we do. But what about when we choose to look for God’s goodness? There is beauty even in the pine straw, briars, weeds and sticks! We just simply have to make the choice on how we want to see things. I’m thankful for a God who sees the beauty in me even when I’m at my worst. We have an always forgiving God who loves us! It gives me goosebumps to know I am so loved!

Here are a few pictures from this morning. Remember God sees your beauty even when you don’t feel beautiful! ~Melynda

God even loves you with bed head! 🥴
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Do you ever feel like giving up?

What a question to ask, do you agree? I mean there are daily things I feel like giving up on. This dang illness is one of them. I have said many times I wouldn’t wish it on my own worst enemy and I mean that. It comes on at random times, is unforgiving. It is difficult to make plans and actually follow through with them. I hate it for my husband if no one else. We should be enjoying each other and here he is stuck with someone that can rarely leave the house most days. I am not complaining, I love my life; my family, my job, my church…the list goes on and on but I am writing this because I feel like it’s good for me to get it off my chest and for others to know they are not alone. Do I ever give up? That answer is a flat out NO! Why? Because I know and have a relationship with the real Life Giver, Great Physician, Prince of Peace, Almighty, Everlasting God! Big G: GOD! He plucked me out off the pits of hell when He did not have to! For that I am ever thankful and will praise Him with my last breath!

Some weeks it seems like the hits keep coming. It has been 11 weeks since I have had my IVIG, it’s an antibody treatment that keeps me working moving, literally. This week I am running like a sloth through tar! Typing this is taking forever because I can only type a little bit and then I have to rest my arms. On a lighter note, yesterday I got my very first Valentine’s supper in bed! What a life! HAHA! Learning to adapt is the key!

Don’t you think that is the way God wants us: Ever learning, ever adapting to His will and not ours? In light of my health issues I think that when we have to go through valleys so deep you think you are in hell we learn to adapt by leaning on him….completely. There are days when I literally cry out in prayer and nothing but tears flow. He knows our needs and he knows our hearts. I am HIS and HE is mine! What a statement! The Creator of our universe cares about every little tear I shed and every need I lift up to Him. Why should I give up when I know who has me in the palm of His hand. Each day I live is one day closer to meeting Him and what a day that will be!

I do want to explain my reason for not blogging lately. I was told by someone close to me that I shouldn’t put all of my business on the internet, that I should delete it and so I did. It really crushed me. I deleted the entire blog. How can I reach others if I cannot express myself? My daily life consists of being cooped up in my house with two dogs for most of the day. It leaves very few opportunities for me to express myself. Blogging does! It allows me to jot down my feelings and thoughts and most importantly SHARE THEM! I have felt robbed but no more! So, for now, I will keep blogging until God decides He has other plans for me.

Thanks for reading! Have a wonderful day! ~Melynda

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When Life Gives You Lemons & You Choose Not To Make Lemonade! 

Yes, I said it! People choose not to make lemonade! Life is not always bubble gum and rainbows & I’m guessing if you are reading this you already know it. The God of the Bible, in whom I worship and serve, never promises life on this earth without conflicts. The Bible states many times when believers were persecuted but God prevailed every single time. Daniel in the lions den (Daniel 6), the fiery furnace (Daniel 3) and Job (the whole book). Each time these Christians believed and God delivered. It wasn’t easy, can you imagine being thrown into a den of lions? A fiery furnace? Allowing Satan to take away everything you have, your wealth, health & family? I cannot imagine that kind of fear however I know the fear I have in my daily life. 

Life has handed me lemons, an entire flipping forty acres of lemons – as far as the eye can see! It’s called Myasthenia Gravis. Why do I have this? No one knows. What causes it? Not sure. Can I be cured? No, maybe who knows. Those are man’s answers. However, I serve a risen Savior who’s in the world today! I know that He is with me whatever men may say! I see His hand of mercy, I hear His voice of cheer and JUST the time I need Him He’s always near! You’re singing aren’t you? I did! He does live! I think sometimes we forget that. We get bogged down in life on this earth and we forget that we are not of this world, let me back up – if YOU have accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior and have a relationship with Him, YOU my brother or sister are not of this earthly world! 

Not choosing to make lemonade shouldn’t be an option for you! Think of what lies ahead! I have my moments when I let life get me down, I am not perfect. In fact you will never hear me say that. I am flawed! Some moments I choose to wallow in self pity. Praise God those are getting to be fewer and farther apart! Life is what YOU choose to make it. That is right, YOU! Happy? Sad? Cheerful? Miserable? You hold that power. You also hold that power to turn people off to Jesus. Just a thought. Many times it hits me that I may have done something that turns someone away from the best gift ever given. It breaks my heart and I have to ask God to forgive me and try to make it right. 

As we celebrate this gift giving season, remember the greatest gift of all -Jesus. He came to earth in the most vulnerable way, a baby. He gave his life so that we could live! So here is my challenge for you; whatever your situation, there is always someone in a worse one. Whatever your health, there is always someone sicker. What ever your financial status, there is always someone poorer. Life will give you lemons, just make lemonade…always make lemonade! 

Merry CHRISTmas to you and yours! ~ Melynda

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When You Don’t Know How To Care Of Yourself…

This blog post is dedicated to all the hard working staff I call my hospital family at Augusta University Medial Center 3West Neuro ICU. 

Let me start with this: I’m currently in the hospital again, the second time this month. Stress is a literal game changer for someone with Myasthenia Gravis and being the perfectionist I am means I have been in overdrive! It took my hospital family having an intervention to make me realize I am killing my self over a wedding.  I have tried to dole out duties and let someone else do them but when they are not done in a timely manner I have panicked! With than being said I’m trying to learn how to take care of me. That is not an easy thing because God made me to be the care giver. Tal fussed at me today and called me “Charles Fuller”  because I won’t let folks know how I really feel – “Hard headed just like your daddy”. Touche’ I admit it – I am hard headed. 

Thankfully this hospital stay has brought a few more things to light. An episode yesterday of tachycardia that lasted about 3 hours was an eye opener! A heart rate of 160-170 will wear you out! I sweat like a marathon runner and was congratulated by my Fitbit on burning 2500 calories during my “cardio workout”. Let’s just say that I hate a gym but I hated that “cardio workout” even more!! The doctors administered an IV drug that was intense!! The cardiologist and neurologist were in the room and assured me the chest pain and shortness of breath wouldn’t “last long”. I guess the deer in the head lights looks I gave them during it made them gather round and reassure me during the process. For a good 30 seconds I thought the next face I would see would be Jesus! I knew I would be fine either way and here my old hard headed tail sits alive and kicking. 😂😂 I now get to be on a medicine to regulate my heart. I think Tal’s grandma is on the same stuff.😂😂

If you are reading this; Thank you for caring, praying & sending love my way. I say it all the time – Prayers have sustained me this far.  May 2017 bring you a Healthy, Prosperous New Year! 

As for me, I’m going to try to learn to take care of me so I will be here for others. The wedding is next weekend so get ready, there will be sappy posts ahead. I only have one daughter and I’m posting so she will have it in the future! And it will be the truth because it will be on Facebook! 😂😂

😘😘😘😘 -Melynda

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When there are no words…

This past week has been a new low for me in my fight against this dread disease-Myasthenia Gravis. By low I mean I have never been this sick in my life. I spent the last six days in ICU running fever, having horrible headaches and the nausea was off the chain. Not a good combination to say the least. I was off and on the Non Invasive Ventilator at first. Having horrible headaches and no one was sure why. I honestly thought I was going to die. I know I scared my family half to death but especially Tal. Days passed and he sat in the recliner in my room with the TV off, at the times I was awake he was there to tell me he loved me. I knew he loved me but this was beyond anything I have seen. My head was pounding so bad that I could hardly function. I was physically miserable. I thanked God for My family and told him whatever His Will was I was ok with it. I know He has plans for me because I am still here. Mama brought me home last night and I’m still in bed. My final diagnosis was aseptic meningitis – google that and scratch your head like i did. Basically i had a reaction to my IVIG, the monthly infusion i take and no one knows why.

Today I have spent the day in bed because I’m sore from the lumbar punctures and the blood patch they did yesterday to seal off a leakage caused from the lumbar puncture.

The Bible never says it will be easy to be a Christian, we all will have battles. So here I am still fighting, until the good Lord says it’s my time to stop.

Thank you for your prayers, texts, and calls. I apologize if I haven’t responded or they didn’t make sense. All I can say is I was not always in my right mind when I responded.

All my love ~ Melynda

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Shock & Awe

So there are times in a parent’s life that children tend to cause a sudden shock to our systems. You know what I’m talking about right? For instance, you unexpectedly get pregnant when you have a six year old and you have been trying for 4 years. Or said baby come out with reddish blonde hair and bright blue eyes when your first child has brown hair and brown eyes. Another example is when your mail lady sends you a private message asking if that is your son on the camo golf cart riding in our yard peeing off the side, (she also stated “I thought that was Tal Poss’ kid). The list can go on forever with this one and I am not kidding. Do you know that I have walked through Wal-Mart with a smiley face sticker on each butt cheek only to get to the car for him to take his thumb out of his mouth and tell me to turn around. He promptly plucked the stickers off of my butt and put them on the back of his hands….UGH! Adam is quiet and always has been so he could just do stuff and you would never know it until the proof came out! This kid has always been FULL of surprises. Over the years I’ve learned to laugh and forgive him for many things.
Last night was no exception at all, he told me less than twenty four hours before the event that he was invited to the Academic Awards Night at school. I asked him what he was getting and in true Adam response he said “I have no idea.” So I frantically tell my mama & Tal’s mama about it and make a call to his sister in Charleston. She assured me she would be there and not to tell him in case something came up. Our entire family was already exhilarated by the LCHS Golf Team winning first place in their region on Monday night and now he gets an invite for Academic Awards!! Woot Woot!!
I’m going to back track for a minute so I can explain why I was so shocked by his invitation. When he was in 10th grade I met with Dr. Gunby, the principal, and told him that I was not going to set Adam up for failure just to be an honor student. Some changes had been made to the way you became an honor student and it is pretty rigorous. Adam is my carefree, do just enough to get by, fly by the seat of your pants and make NO plans kind of child. Get my point? I have always picked my battles with him and I was not prepared to fight with him and make him hate school. I never thought anything more about it to be honest with you. I was just glad his grades were good, he was an athlete and all around good kid. He was able to get accepted to Augusta University, his first choice so Mama was happy!
Tuesday night made Mama so happy she couldn’t even sleep! We are sitting there about 8-9 rows back from Adam and they announce the SAT/ACT High Achievers category and what had to be accomplished to receive this award.  I knew that Adam would be getting this because he did good on his SAT. It came with $100 to put toward his education. They called his name. I was so proud and figured that was it. When they got to Scholar Athlete Awards I figured it went to the kids that were recognized through the year as scholar athletes. They stated that they had to play sports for three years and have an overall A average. THEY CALLED HIS NAME! I leaned over, told Mama “he has an A average” and we just grinned. He walked like he was trying to catch the bus on the highway of death to get to the stage and we clapped. I snapped pictures it was great! The program continues and give away what seemed like a million more awards and I figured that was it for Adam.

Myasthenia Gravis was not being very nice and trying to make me look a like Popeye – Grumpy Cat combo. When I am tired I loose all ability to control my facial expressions and my right eye just shuts. It’s not a pretty look that is for sure! After loosing the facial control, my neck gets weak and then my arms and legs. One thing I have a bad habit of doing when I get tired is moving my arms and legs. If they stop working I am up poop creek with no paddle. Someone is going to have to physically get me to the vehicle. I wish I could say my husband whisks me up in his arms and carries me wherever I need to go. Nope, it’s more like he bends over hoists me up over his shoulder and just totes me flailing around to the car. Yep, butt in air, head flopping ugliness going on. Anyway, Tal was not present for the awards, he chose to stay home, guess who is regretting that choice?

Anyway, I am wiggling and moving around making sure my body is going to work for me so I can leave on my own accord and all of a sudden in the middle of handing out gold tassels to the honor graduates they get to a couple of kids in front of Adam. We sit there patiently waiting to leave and next they announce “Adam Poss”…all four of our jaws dropped in our laps and I burst out in tears. My baby boy achieved something I had put aside as him never wanting to be bothered by. In a million years I never dreamed he would achieve this and it’s not because I didn’t think he could, I just thought he would never want to. I have made HIM do ALL the work his entire high school career. My philosophy is “I am not fixing you supper while you are 40 and still parked on my sofa!” You have to do it yourself and he did!
My mother in law described it best as “pure pride” that we felt. We were beaming! When Adam looked at us he gave us his trademark crooked grin and I swear his tooth in the corner of his mouth cha-chinged in the light like an Orbit gum commercial! And then he walked like he was still trying to catch the bus on the highway of death while racing snails. BTW-The snails were in the lead.

When it was all over I told him how proud I was of him and asked him when he knew. He said “UUUHHHH, when they called my name.” That is Adam for you! My goodness my heart is so full and happy right now I can hardly stand myself. My baby will be walking across the football field his grandmother, father, sister and numerous other relatives walked to receive their diplomas in just a few short weeks. I love life in our small town. I am attaching a video with just one of the highlights from this week. The seniors don their caps and gowns and walk through the halls of the same elementary school they attended to the delight and applause of the children attending there now. Last night I made sure that Adam had all of his stuff so he could put on his attire and proudly walk through the school one last time. He assured me he had it all this morning when I called to wake him up. “Have a great day, I love you” I said. “I love you too” he replied. All was well with the world. My friend Kathy Moore recorded this video for me and sent it to me. I was beaming with pride in my office only to see Adam looks naked under his gown because all I can see is hairy legs and tennis shoes. Good grief! I immediately text him and asked him if he was wearing shorts to which his text reply came back “maybe”! Oh sweet mother of pearl, my life will never be boring with this one!

Thanks for reading, sorry if I chased too many rabbits, excitement will do that for you!

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Tough stuff to share…

Through my battle with Myasthenia Gravis there are things I don’t like to share. Things I don’t want people to see or hear but, this week has been rough. One of the symptoms that I struggle with is a feeling of “impending doom”. It’s hard to describe and share how I truly feel. This feeling is not every day. It comes at random times and when it hits it does not play. I feel like I am going to die, at any given moment.

This past Tuesday when I woke up I knew it was not going to be a good day. My first thought when I hit my alarm clock was – I am not going to be here for Adam’s graduation. I know that this is not real. It is not me, it is not how I am made but it is debilitating. I refuse to give in to it so I do my best to ignore it. I got dressed and cried because in my mind I was going to die while having a bad hair day. I prayed for strength to fight this demon. I get in the car and start to back out the driveway when I have to stop and pray away the fear of dying in a car wreck. For the past couple of months to conserve energy and keep people from worrying about me I have been riding with a friend from work. I meet her at her house. On Tuesday when I got in her car Donna looked at me and said “How’s it going?” I cry again and have to explain what’s going on. Donna is ever the optimist and said “It’s going to be a great day today!” I get to work and cry because my pen ran out of ink. I’m not sure how that was going to kill me but whatever! I go to the bathroom and decide I’m going to die in the bathroom at DDEAMC because I might fall and hit my head. Jeepers! It was an all day affair of fear, prayer, fear, prayer. I think I prayed so much Jesus even said “It’s her AGAIN?”

I’m driving home from Donna’s house and Kathryn calls. We are talking when she makes a joke and I…yep you guessed it…burst into tears. Since getting diagnose with MG I have been so worried about my kids not being effected by this that I had not shared with Kathryn this part of the process. She took it better than I thought and assured me everything would be fine. She had no clue I dealt with this. I think she was speechless when I told her I cried about possibly hitting my head on the toilet and dying. After a long pause she said it you die that way I am putting it in your obituary. Note to self, I must die in a non dramatic fashion. 😂😂

I get home, pick up Mama and we go to vote. I see one of Kathryn’s life long friends who asks me how I am doing. At this point I can’t cover up the fact I’ve been crying all day. I look at Rozina and tell her that i am not having a good day. Her response is jumping up from her chair and embracing me in a huge hug in which she tells me she loves me and it will be ok. Well, that made me tear up even more! That small gesture meant more than she will ever know.

I finally make it home and Adam had come in from the State Championship Golf Tournament he played in on Monday & Tuesday. They didn’t place anywhere near first but they had fun. The team played in the pouring down rain and he made memories. He made me smile when he came home talking a mile a minute because that is rare. We talked for a bit and i went to bed.

When I woke up on Wednesday morning just as quickly as it had appeared it was gone. I felt good mentally and physically. I know it’s long and boring but I want people to know that sometime I simply cannot say that I’m doing good. Some days just stink and there is nothing you nor I can do about it.

I am not scared of dying at all. I have peace in knowing I will be with Jesus. I know that I will be healed in the heavenly fashion. However I would love to see Adam graduate tomorrow, meet my grandchildren (no she is not pregnant) and grow old with Tal like we planned. But let’s face it; we are not promised tomorrow. So, as for now I am making the most of each day I spend here on this earth. I do know what I am promised; eternal like with an Almighty God! How exciting is that? It reminds me of a song that I love to sing:

There is coming a day,
When no heart aches shall come,
No more clouds in the sky,
No more tears to dim the eye,
All is peace forever more,
On that happy golden shore,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

What a day that will be,
When my Jesus I shall see,
And I look upon His face,
The One who saved me by His grace;
When He takes me by the hand,
And leads me through the Promised Land,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

There’ll be no sorrow there,
No more burdens to bear,
No more sickness, no pain,
No more parting over there;
And forever I will be,
With the One who died for me,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

And what a day that will be but for now I will keep praying and plugging along!

Thanks for reading ~ Melynda

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Memories on Father’s Day

God gifted me with the most wonderful, loving, hot tempered, hard headed handful of a father. I can say that because I’m just like him in a lot of ways. He loved with every part of his being, he got mad with every part too! 😂 We would butt heads like goats in a fight, say our peace and return to our corners never to discuss the dispute again. My brother…he is exactly like my dad. I can hear his grunt and eye roll over that read now. My mama has had an entertaining life to say the least! She has had to laugh to keep from crying.

In life we are given one biological father: good, bad and indifferent that is the truth! My daddy has been gone for 3 years and Father’s Day has and probably always will be tough. I was a Daddy’s girl. I went fishing, hunting, working, fire calling, truck driving, school skipping 😂, grocery shopping, house remodeling, step by step with my daddy. All the way to the end of his life. I was sitting in a chair next to him when he took his last breath. Tough? Yes it was tough but what was worse was watching this man full of life and personality be stuck in a hospital bed day in and day out telling us he was useless. God made that easier for us to let him go. There are days I miss him like crazy and days that I celebrate the wonderful life he and Mama provided for us.

If you are like me there are many men who have fit the “Father” category that have had an essential part in my life. My daddy’s friends treated me like their own and they still do! Since my diagnosis of Myasthenia Gravis my Daddy might not be here but MANY have filled that spot! Daddy’s best friend Billy comes to mind first. When I’m sick he and his wife Sonora are there. He has cried for me, prayed for me, worried about me, fussed at me and filled my daddy’s shoes. In fact, if he is reading this, he is more than likely teary- eyed and I will get a phone call.

Other men that don’t have to but choose to fill my daddy’s shoes are his brother Gene, his best friend Steve, my Uncle Ben, our friend Kenny, our Pastor Jerry, my brother Wyatt and my husband Tal. I might not talk to them everyday but I can’t get away with nothing! I know that all I have to do is call them and there they are, no questions. They keep check, take care, fuss over and keep me in line. The difference between them and daddy’s is that they do it gingerly. 😂😂😂 Tal is the only one that give me the head butting goat fight and maybe Wyatt occasionally. One of the last times my daddy was in the hospital he called me back into his room when Tal and I were leaving to say these exact words: “Did you know that you did a real good job finding someone just like me? Boy, Tal is just like me!” I laughed and replied “Yes sir, you have know idea!” Mama and I laugh a bunch of days because Tal feels like he has to keep up with the two of us! 😂😂 Good luck!

I have been so fortunate to have the love of a good father in my life time. For those of you that know, it is priceless. For those of you that haven’t experienced that yet, there is such a thing. Our Heavenly Father provides such a love for us that is unmatched by anything you or I have ever know and all you have to do is accept it. I never dreamed that I would lose my daddy at soon as I did but God has stepped in, showed up and showed out in ways that are indescribable and unimaginable. He has provided love and comfort when I needed it and He can provide for you too. While I miss my daddy I have peace in knowing he is waiting with my Heavenly Father on me one day. So this Father’s Day if you have your Dad present, hug him tight, tell him that you love him, put down your phone and spend time with him because we are never guaranteed tomorrow. Make those memories while you can.

To all of you dads; Happy Father’s Day!

Much love and thanks for reading! ~Melynda

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