Do you ever feel like giving up?

What a question to ask, do you agree? I mean there are daily things I feel like giving up on. This dang illness is one of them. I have said many times I wouldn’t wish it on my own worst enemy and I mean that. It comes on at random times, is unforgiving. It is difficult to make plans and actually follow through with them. I hate it for my husband if no one else. We should be enjoying each other and here he is stuck with someone that can rarely leave the house most days. I am not complaining, I love my life; my family, my job, my church…the list goes on and on but I am writing this because I feel like it’s good for me to get it off my chest and for others to know they are not alone. Do I ever give up? That answer is a flat out NO! Why? Because I know and have a relationship with the real Life Giver, Great Physician, Prince of Peace, Almighty, Everlasting God! Big G: GOD! He plucked me out off the pits of hell when He did not have to! For that I am ever thankful and will praise Him with my last breath!

Some weeks it seems like the hits keep coming. It has been 11 weeks since I have had my IVIG, it’s an antibody treatment that keeps me working moving, literally. This week I am running like a sloth through tar! Typing this is taking forever because I can only type a little bit and then I have to rest my arms. On a lighter note, yesterday I got my very first Valentine’s supper in bed! What a life! HAHA! Learning to adapt is the key!

Don’t you think that is the way God wants us: Ever learning, ever adapting to His will and not ours? In light of my health issues I think that when we have to go through valleys so deep you think you are in hell we learn to adapt by leaning on him….completely. There are days when I literally cry out in prayer and nothing but tears flow. He knows our needs and he knows our hearts. I am HIS and HE is mine! What a statement! The Creator of our universe cares about every little tear I shed and every need I lift up to Him. Why should I give up when I know who has me in the palm of His hand. Each day I live is one day closer to meeting Him and what a day that will be!

I do want to explain my reason for not blogging lately. I was told by someone close to me that I shouldn’t put all of my business on the internet, that I should delete it and so I did. It really crushed me. I deleted the entire blog. How can I reach others if I cannot express myself? My daily life consists of being cooped up in my house with two dogs for most of the day. It leaves very few opportunities for me to express myself. Blogging does! It allows me to jot down my feelings and thoughts and most importantly SHARE THEM! I have felt robbed but no more! So, for now, I will keep blogging until God decides He has other plans for me.

Thanks for reading! Have a wonderful day! ~Melynda